I'm gay and autistic. It took me years to understand what I needed in sex and relationships.

• Ian Donley is a gay and autistic man.
• In college, he had a lot of casual sex with men because physical touch was important to him.
• Now he says that while sex gives him a needed rush, he wants something emotionally meaningful.

I'm autistic, and most people I meet, especially on dates, don't understand what that means.

They point to TV shows like "Atypical" and "The Good Doctor" or to the "socially awkward kid" your parents forced you to befriend. That's not me.