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- I had an account on Facebook for 11 years before it was suspended.
- I used it for my business marketing and to stay in touch with friends.
- Almost a year later I'm grateful I was banned.
"Your Facebook account has been suspended because your account, or activity on it, doesn't follow our Community Standards."
My heart dropped into my stomach as my mind fumbled around the words I was reading. I hadn't broken any rules. In fact, I never had a single issue during my 11 years on Facebook.
I had been using my account for networking and marketing for my business. It also helped me stay in contact with friends and family all over the world.
Suddenly Facebook blocked me from my account
An email from Facebook said I had 30 days to disagree with their decision. The only other information given was a link to their "Community Standards" page. I read in disbelief. I'd done nothing against this. It was mind boggling that they banned me with no other explanation or means of resolution.
The email ended with a button labeled "Disagree with decision." Freaking out, I clicked it repeatedly. I felt helpless at my inability to communicate with friends, clients, and connections. For many of them, I had no other contact information.
Weeks passed as I persisted but nothing happened. My angst escalated from panic to visceral anxiety. Constant knots in my stomach and neck fought for my attention.
All I could think about was how to fix this
It felt like I'd been cut off from the world both mentally and emotionally. It would have felt empowering to decide to take a detox break from social media. Having it forced upon me was discombobulating.
Then, one morning, I woke with a sudden jolt of reality. I might never get the powers that be at Facebook to see that they'd issued an unwarranted shut down of my account. This compelled me to look at the situation in a new way.
Getting banned gave me clarity
At that moment, I realized the truth of my Facebook habits. I'd been posting and checking notifications several times daily for years. My brain babbled in the background about other people's posts and how I'd frame my own. That incessant mind chatter never shut down, even when the app did.
It was like working with a super slow computer where the frustration mounts and you're ready to throw it through a window. Then you finally realize there's a dozen apps running in the background, and that's why it's bogged down.
The forced shutdown was a reboot, providing much needed calm and clarity. The disconnection from Facebook taught me some key lessons. Looking back on the past several months, I can see how the changes to my social media habits are improving my mental health.
Brief one or two day social media breaks aren't enough to clear my head. I'd done those digital detoxes before. I never felt completely free of the incessant mental chatter. This time, it took me about two weeks to feel better being off Facebook. On reflection, it's clear I could have experienced mental calm sooner if I hadn't dwelled on my lack of control over the situation. I think a seven day detox from my other social accounts is the sweet spot for me now.
Deep, meaningful connection boosts my happiness. Being banned forced me to consider the quality of my relationships. I asked myself, "which of these people would I want to stay in touch with if I had to make the effort of only connecting one on one?" There's a bigger time and energy investment required for individual messages vs. Facebook blasts. Acknowledging this reminded me how important it is to stay intentional about connecting. I started taking the necessary steps to maintain relationships with those who matter most to me.
I function best when I align my life with my strengths. Being banned from Facebook helped me see that a platform built for scrolling isn't where I'm meant to be. My superpower is writing nuanced long-form content.
At first, I felt panicked and powerless over Facebook banning my account. Today, I'm grateful for the experience. It gifted me a fresh perspective. In the end, it has made a positive impact on my business, relationships, and mental health.