My 3rd child was a daughter, and with her, I felt more pressure to be a role model. She's always watching what I'm doing.

Sat, 08/03/2024 - 05:17

Amanda Miller Littlejohn with her sons and daughter at the beach, they are smiling in the sun and standing on the sand. — The author has two sons and a daughter.
Courtesy of Amanda Miller Littlejohn

I had two sons in my 20s and my daughter just before I turned 40.
With my sons, I felt less pressure to be their role model.
My daughter looks to me for clues about how to act, and it's made me rethink things.

I have always disliked the term "mini-me" in reference to children. I've always felt it to be a dangerous setup for both parent and child. I know it's an innocent term of endearment, but a child is not meant to be a replica of you — they're another distinct human being with their own preferences, ideas, and feelings.