DK Publishing
- Benji Xavier, 28, followed fad diets for years, which led him to develop an unhealthy relationship with food.
- He lost 100 pounds by cutting down on fast food and cooking healthier versions of his favorite meals.
- He has maintained his weight loss for two years because his healthy habits have become a lifestyle.
When Benji Xavier struggled to find clothes that fit him on a shopping trip in August 2021, he decided things needed to change.
Xavier, 28, based in New Jersey, had always struggled with his weight and spent many years trying fad diets that left him miserable.
"I lost weight, but it wasn't in the healthiest way. I was kind of falling victim to that toxic diet culture," he told Business Insider.
He's not alone: the US diet industry was estimated to be valued at more than $70 billion in 2023. However, attitudes toward weight loss appear to be shifting away from unhealthy quick fixes toward a focus on nutrition and long-term, sustainable changes. People who take GLP-1s such as Wegovy and Mounjaro, meanwhile, have previously told BI using that using the medications validated their experiences that dieting doesn't work, reflecting how society unfairly blames weight gain on a lack of willpower.
Xavier lost 100 pounds in high school on a restrictive diet, but it was "unsustainable," he said. Balancing a degree with internships in college paired with emotional eating saw him gain all the weight back.
Weighing 282, pounds Xavier felt unconfident, self-conscious, and increasingly concerned about his health because of a family history of obesity-related conditions including type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol.
In 2021, Xavier decided to embark on a second, but this time sustainable, weight-loss journey.
"My mindset started shifting because I'm like, I'm getting older, I need to be healthy. It isn't just about looks and being thin," he said.
He lost 85 pounds in around nine months, and a further 15 pounds a few months later after he took a break from weight loss. One to two pounds is a safe amount of weight to lose each week, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Xavier lost 100 pounds by cutting down on fast food and cooking healthier versions of his favorite meals
When he was at his heaviest, Xavier typically ate fast food multiple times a day. And when he did eat a home-cooked meal, he binged.
"You can imagine that those calories are really racking up, and you just put on the weight," he said.
Benji Xavier
Once he stopped eating out so much and started cooking healthier versions of his favorite foods, Xavier entered a natural calorie deficit — when a person burns more calories than they eat. He began losing weight quickly without having to count calories. Xavier's upcoming cookbook, "The Rebel Diet," features recipes he used to lose weight sustainably.
He was also conscious not to demonize specific foods or cut out entire food groups because he knew that wasn't realistic or healthy. Instead, he ate higher calorie foods in moderation, made lower-calorie swaps, like using low-fat cheese, and chose foods that would keep him feeling full for longer, like high-protein pasta.
He also signed up to a gym and started working out six days a week. His workout routine consisted of 30 minutes of cardio four times a week and weightlifting six days a week.
The CDC recommends doing at least 150 minutes a week of moderate-intensity activity, and activities that strengthen muscles two days a week. Experts have previously told BI that rest is crucial for our health, too.
It's also important to note that while exercise has many health benefits, it has a smaller effect on weight than many people think.
In a few months, Xavier lost around 50 pounds. When his progress plateaued, he started tracking his calories. He used a food tracker app and a scale to work out his maintenance calories and subtracted 10 to 20% to calculate what he needed to eat to lose weight.
"That helped get me out of that plateau and know what was going on," he said.
It's a lifestyle, not a diet
Now that he's maintaining his weight and not trying to lose more, Xavier works out less but still tries to do 30 minutes of cardio a day, even if it's a short walk in the park.
"I enjoy working out now," he said.
Benji Xavier
He also still cooks a lot and now intuitively knows how much he can eat without gaining weight, but doesn't obsess over it.
These habits have become part of his lifestyle, which has helped him maintain his weight loss for two years. He has "cheat days," and eats whatever he wants on holiday without feeling guilty because he knows he'll return home to a healthy lifestyle. "You're not going to ruin your life all in one day from one meal," he said.
But he stressed that it took time and effort to reach this stage. "It's a lifestyle, not a diet, and I think it takes practice to really understand," he said.
Finding balance to heal his relationship with food
Xavier started his weight journey with the goal of getting healthier, rather than losing weight, and it's left him happier than ever.
"I was just sick of it. I'm like, no, I can't do this. I can't torture myself anymore. I'm just going to try to eat healthier. And it worked," he said.
Before, it felt like a constant mental battle, he said, as he deprived himself of foods he loved and became obsessed with what he couldn't have. He also felt intense guilt and anxiety if he ate something "bad."
"It's hard to struggle with weight and try to maintain a healthy weight and just health overall when you suffer from obesity or you're prone to being obese, but yet you have to eat every single day," he said.
Now he feels better emotionally, mentally, and physically, he said, which motivates him to stay healthy.
"I finally have reached a place where it's like, okay, everything works. I'm happy. I found balance. I have a healthy relationship with food now," he said.